Hello. My name is Andrew Fitzgerald, and I play too much Facebook (well, Zynga) Poker
1. At the time of writing this I have around $2.5 billion in chips. There are many curious things one could write about the Facebook poker economy. The fact that people actually sell these chips potentially, it has been pointed out to me, has implications for 'real' inflation, for instance. One thing I really like, however, is the mirror it holds up to society's sexual politics. See that hot girl who just sat down at the table
2? In a few moments she will be inundated with drinks, flowers, 'poker-buddy' requests and possibly (if she's lucky) a few gracious offers of a good boning. Conversely ... you see that ugly-as-fuck but terribly (virtually) rich guy that just sat at the table? Yeah, in a few moments he'll be getting much the same treatment from a bevy of virtual gold-diggers. Sadly, however, much of this stops at the truly big tables where such vixens cannot even afford to sit. All I get nowadays are hackers trying to phish for my account password, and constant friend requests from people begging for chips.
WOE! It makes, then, for quite a refreshing change when one receives correspondence from someone truly interested in the
game, as I did today:
I am worshipper of game poker and I would want you to ask that you accomplished to gather as a lot of money in this game. For example who at your opinion is the secret of your success. Your advices with will be precious, for this reason you will request with answers.
Have one splendid day!!
Thank-you, random babel fish user. This friend request I think I shall accept.
1Hi Andrew.....
2Well, O.K. .... the person whose profile picture is a hot girl. Christ knows if it's even a she, let alone whether or not the picture corresponds in any way with the person in question.
Posts
7 comments:
who at your opinion is the secret of your success ...
Jesus?
Germaine Greer?
The tax payers of New Zealand for paying for your PhD scholarship?
Hooray!
Fitz is back!
And today:
"thnx for add my friend.would you like to say now how you could have to much chips at the poker??"
What to answer.... My office-mate suggests writing a response then sending it through a chain of babel fish Chinese whispers.
That or I could just respond.......
I bought them all off e-bay from a reliable seller named quackyjoe?
O.K.I sent the following long response:
Firstly, you want to learn to calculate your pot odds and your expected yields (see here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pot_odds), and after that implied odds (same page)- which is a little more 'touchy-feely'. These are fundamentally important, especially when you're fishing - sometimes you have to work out whether it's worth your while to call raises, other times you have to buy the next card by raising yourself. If you're up against really aggressive players it's often cheaper to do this if you want to stay in the hand - in general, people are willing to raise more than they would be willing to call when they're not sure how strong their hand is . It's useful to remember that when you've hit the nuts.
Secondly, learn your table (is it loose or passive, tight or aggressive? How much does it cost to throw people out?). Pre-flop, you want to look at your cards and ask yourself how many other hands you want to play against, and work out how much it will cost to do that. With pocket aces, for instance you want to get as many chips into the pot as you can with ONE caller. If you have lowish suited connectors you want a lot of callers, since you'll KNOW when you're safely ahead with them but it's a lot less likely to happen (so you want a large pot relative to what you're paying to be in it) and you usually just can't afford to call bluffs with them when you're still fishing. Remember: a lot of callers tends to keep people honest.
Thirdly, always be aware of position. The best position to be in is on the dealer button, since after the flop you're the last to speak. You are always acting with more information than everybody else has. For this reason, the button alone is worth something, and you should call more often pre-flop when you're on it. In addition, if you're just BEFORE the button it can be worthwhile to make otherwise dodgy pre-flop raises just to throw the dealer out.
Be very careful about calling really large pre-flop raises on anything other than premium heads-up hands unless you have a very good idea about the kind of hands the person raises on and you know him to be a donkey. If you're like most people on Facebook, for instance, Ace Jack is not nearly as good as you think it is. Don't bluff unless you feel in your gut it will work, especially in a real live game. The more confident you feel, the more confident you'll look. Also, your intuition can be trained, but it won't be unless you act on it.
Lastly, a good way to get chips is to buy on ebay from a reliable seller named QuackyJoe.
Babel Fish English-Greek-English Chinese Whisper:
Initially, you want to learn to calculate your probabilities of containers and your expected productions (you see here: did http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pot_odds), and after this imply the probabilities (same page) - that is a little more '? quick-tempered-feely'. Are these completely important, special when you'? [epan] fishery - sometimes it should you solve if it'? s his value you while in order to you call the increases, other years where it should you buy the next card with the upbringing. If you'? [epan] above against the really aggressive institutions it'? s often cheaper in order to it makes this if you want to remain in the hand - in general, persons willing does increase is more from would be willing does call when they'? [epan] not certain how much their powerful hand is. It'? s useful it remembers that when you'? the VE struck the walnuts.
[Afeteroy], you learn your table (he is relaxed or passive, tight or aggressive? How many this costs in order to it throws the persons outside). The prolapse, you wants it examines your cards and it wonders how many other hands you want to play adversely, and it solves how many will cost in order to it makes this. With the aces of pockets, as an example you want to take so much chips in the container that you can also with visitor. If you have lowish the [tairiagmenoys] fasteners you want a lot of visitors, from you'? ll [XERTE] when you'? [epan] not dangerous front with their but it'? part HM more likely it happens (thus you want a big container with regard to who you'? [epan] payment in order to it is in) and you usually precisely can'? does the t bear economically it calls bluffs with their when you'? [epan] still fishery. Remember: a lot of visitors tend they keep the persons honest.
Pre-thirdly, [gnorizte] always the place. Is the better place it is in t o button of tradesmen, from then after the fall you'? with regard to the last one in order to it speaks. You act always with more information than each one it has differently. For this reason, does the button deserve only something, and it should you call more often the prolapse when you'? [Pe] in. Moreover, if you'? [epan] immediately BEFORE FROM the button that can be important to become otherwise dodgy prolapse increases in order to it throws precisely the tradesman outside.
Be very careful for the call of really big prolapse increases in nothing apart from the head hands of premium unless you have a very good idea for the good of hands that the person increases above also knows him in order to you are a donkey. If you'? [Pe] as most persons in Facebook, as an example, ace Jack is not almost as good as you think that they are. Don'? the t Bluff unless you feel in this your intestine will function, specifically in a real live game. More certain you feel, most certain you'? ll look. Also, can your intuition be educated, but this won'? the t is unless you act in.
Finally, a good way are acquired the chips is to buy in ebay from a reliable salesman that is named QuackyJoe.
I feel we're having a fruitful conversation here.
I particularly like: "It'? s useful it remembers that when you'? the VE struck the walnuts." and "Don'? the t Bluff unless you feel in this your intestine will function".
My favourite is 'quick-tempered-feely'.
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